Gently Wean Your Baby Off Being Rocked To Sleep

Introduction

Rocking or using movement is one of the most common ways to get newborn babies to sleep. We naturally cuddle and rock babies when they are upset, plus babies are used to constant movement when inside the womb.

Plus The Happiest Baby techniques of swinging and jiggling can calm even the fussiest, colicky newborn, so it's no wonder many parents love to settle their baby in this way.

Parents may use the buggy, baby carrier or even car-rides to get their baby to sleep, particularly when it seems like nothing else will settle them. This is one of the reasons contact naps are such a common and popular way for parents to help their babies and toddlers sleep during the day.

Parents often continue to use movement as a settling technique with older babies, but it does get increasingly difficult as your baby gets bigger and heavier! Also it generally starts to take longer and longer, making the whole process of rocking your baby to sleep quite an ordeal. We often hear of babies who need 1-2 hours to rocking to get to sleep and our arms and back ache just at the mere thought of it!

Rocking quickly becomes a firm habit, as baby learns they need this movement to get to sleep. Over time this means they will not only want to be rocked at bedtime, they will also want to be rocked back to sleep every time they wake in the night......which is on average 4-6 times for babies over 5 months.

'Rocking to sleep' in this article is a general term we use to cover all forms of movement to settle your baby to sleep. So this means this information covers the following settling techniques:

• Rocking

• Patting or cuddling

• Walking around with baby

• Contact naps in the baby carrier  

• Using the buggy to settle baby

• Jiggling or swaying

• Bouncing on a swiss ball

• Bouncing baby in a bouncinette

• Using an electric baby swing

• Car-rides or rocking the capsule

• Any other way you move your baby to get them to sleep.....

For babies under 3 months

When babies are newborn, how they fall asleep often doesn't have too much impact on their sleep. You may be rocking to sleep and your baby is sleeping a long stretch over night, or having good day sleeps. This is because newborns drift in and out of sleep cycles, and haven't yet learned habits of how they get to sleep.

One impact of rocking a newborn to sleep can be catnapping. This is particularly true if you rock a baby to sleep, then transfer them to their bassinet. They may sense you are not there when they wake or miss the sound of your heart-beat, and will wake up shortly after being put down.

Particularly sensitive newborns want constant subtle movement in order to stay asleep, which is why contact naps in a baby-wearing can help with longer sleeps.

Plus you may also feel that you are rocking all the time or that it is taking longer and longer to get your baby to sleep. This can be exhausting, particularly if your baby sleeps for only a short time and then needs resettling again with more rocking!

Babies sleep changes a lot during the 4 month 'sleep regression' and as they get close to 5 months of age. A baby who is rocked to sleep and has been sleeping all or most of the night will likely start waking again after 5 months. If the rocking to sleep continues at bedtime and during the day, many babies go back to waking 4-6 times or more every night, wanting to be rocked back to sleep every 2 hours.

Choosing to help your baby fall asleep without rocking means you both may well get more sleep sooner, if that is something you would find helpful.

Weaning newborns off being rocked to sleep

1. For babies under 4 months, start by reviewing The Happiest Baby techniques of Swaddling, White Noise and Side/Stomach position etc. Often using these settling techniques will make enough difference that you can reduce the rocking needed. However do note that babies should be weaned off swaddling as soon as they show signs of rolling.

2. Use the feed/play/sleep routine during the day, so you are settling baby when she is tired....and feeding baby when she wakes up. The quicker you spot the tired signs and avoid an over-tired baby, the easier it will be to settle her.

3. Gradually reduce the amount of movement you use with your baby. For example, if you currently rock your baby to sleep, change to rocking until she is drowsy and put her into bed partially awake.

4. If you use a carrier for contact naps, try popping baby into the carrier but settling with less movement. Or use the carrier to extend a nap that started in the bassinet.

5. Over time, put your baby into bed awake and let her get drowsy and fall asleep in bed rather than on you.

6. if your baby is a cat-napper, try to only use rocking to resettle, rather than at the start of a sleep.

7. Try going in 5 minutes before your baby normally wakes, and try gently disturbing her so she stirs slightly. This can help your baby fall back into another sleep cycle and avoid the need to rock her back to sleep.

    

    

Babies over 5 months - continued night waking

If you are wanting to encourage your baby to sleep longer stretches through the night and eventually be able to settle without your help, then weaning your baby off being rocked to sleep is likely a key step in this development.

This is because all babies over 4-5 months wake FULLY between sleep cycles (usually 4-6 times a night minimum) and to 'sleep through the night' or a long stretch, they need to be able to resettle after each sleep cycle. If your baby is rocked to sleep at bedtime, you'll likely need to rock baby back to sleep at each night-waking too (or feed to sleep).

For babies over the age of 5 months, rocking to sleep is one of the most common reasons that babies continue needing help to resettle through the night. This is true for babies who were sleeping long stretches and start waking again, and is the reason why many babies have never slept through or had longer stretches of sleep.

Of course if you and baby are happy with rocking and feeding during the night to get back to sleep, this is fine to continue. These tips only apply if you are wanting to encourage more sleep through the night.

Deciding to wean your baby off being rocked to sleep

Regardless of the age of your baby, you can wean your baby off being rocked to sleep relatively easily - when you are ready to do it and you are happy your baby is ready to reduce to stop movement to get to sleep.

Rocking to sleep becomes a very strong habit over time, with both adult and baby relying on it as the way baby gets to sleep. So commitment from all caregivers to teaching baby a new settling technique is essential if you are going to be successful with this change.

While you have an end goal of teaching your baby to settle to sleep without rocking, it's worth noting that this doesn't mean using 'cry it out'.....there are lots of options for teaching babies to settle without rocking to sleep. Choose one that you as a family are comfortable with. Different techniques work for different families, depending on the age of the baby, how quickly you need it to work, what you are happy trying.

Also remember your consistency and commitment to your sleep plan will be the main thing which determines if your baby learns to settle without rocking to sleep, so only start when YOU are ready and you feel this is the right next step.

Recognise that teaching your baby a new settling technique takes days or weeks...do not expect your baby to like the change immediately or instantly sleep through the night after 1 day!

But you should start to see improvements after 4-5 days if you are being consistent with always using the new technique and not confusing your baby by rocking her back to sleep in the night.